Friday, July 27, 2012

Help Me With My Marriage: Adding Adventure and Fun to Your ...

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Is Your Inner Child (or Your Spouse?s) Bored in Your Marriage?

bored child

Some people enjoy a highly stable and routine relationship.? Doing the same thing every day and going out to the same restaurant every week is all they want.? Other people though need something more.? And, if they don?t get it in their marriage, it can cause problems.? Fortunately, there are many ways to keep a marriage fresh and adventurous.

The Right Amount of Challenge

There needs to be a moderate level of challenge in our relationships
in order for us to stay satisfied with them.? Too much challenge and
we are stressed.? Too little challenge and our minds drift to more
exciting things or even to seemingly more exciting people.? Either
way can spell disaster for a relationship.

Boredom Can Cause Fighting

Did you know that one of the reasons for conflict in relationships
is to relieve boredom?? Take any two people that live together day in
and day out without any conflicts whatsoever and after awhile they
will find things to argue about.? Arguing about silly or meaningless
things in your relationship can be a sign of boredom.? Did your
husband fold the towels wrong?? Did your wife park the car too close
to the garage door?? Come on?time to find more exciting challenges
in your relationship besides fighting over these stupid things!

The Right Questions Stimulate Ideas

Because every couple is different, the best way to find out what would liven up your marriage is for you and your spouse to use questions that stimulate ideas, rather than just following someone else?s list of what is good to do. Here are some questions that you and your spouse can talk about to create ideas that will help your marriage to be more fun.

1.? If you won the lottery, what would you do after all of your
bills and financial needs have been taken care of?

2.? Other than your family, what do you care about most in this
world?? How would you like to get involved with that?

3.? What did you most enjoy doing as a teenager?? Are there any of
those things you would like to do now?

4.? If you could be a character in any movie, what character would
you like to be?? What would you need to do to be more like that
character in your real life?

5.? If somebody declared that you and your partner could have a day
where you didn?t need to follow any rules, laws, or regulations,
whatsoever, what would you like to do?

6.? If you could live in any period of history, where and when would
you like to live?? What interests you about that time and place?
How could you make your current life more like that?

Be Careful Not to Criticize Fantasies

You can use these questions as topic starters with your partner and
get as silly as you want.? I would suggest that you both make a rule
not to censure or judge each others answers and understand that
this is fantasy.? Any major differences are to be forgotten When your
talk is over.

Look for Overlap, Not for Differences

The exciting thing about this kind of discussion with your partner
is that you both are likely to have some areas of overlap, where your
ideas are the same or similar.? Those would be great places to start
working together to put more adventure into your relationship.

Source: http://coachjackito.com/blog/help-me-with-my-marriage-adding-adventure-and-fun-to-your-marriage/

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